Bianca & Joe’s Disco-Balled Woodland Mayhem
80s love ballads on full blast
The day kicked off with the sun cooking us alive, me and Hammad bombing it down the road with the roof metaphorically off and 80s love ballads on full blast. Because nothing gets you in the mood for photographing strangers in the forest quite like screaming Total Eclipse of the Heart at your dashboard.
First time at Candleston Woods and honestly… holy sh*t. If you are a pair of beautiful weirdos who want to get lost in the trees for a weekend with your favourite people, just book it. The place is a festival waiting to happen.
THE HIGHLIGHT
having our photos taken so Was much fun!
The team (Naim & Hamad) fit in so perfectly with our special day and made having our photos taken so much fun! We’re not a particularly posy couple so their documentary style photography suited us down to the ground. They were super friendly and personable – our guests are still buzzing about how lovely they were!
The Backstory & Proposal
Bianca & Joe met on Hinge six years ago. Covid hit five months in, so they moved in together, survived lockdown, and came out the other side still snogging. They now live in Bristol with their pup Bonnie and spend weekends camping in Wales and Cornwall, probably scaring ramblers with their woodland PDA.
Joe proposed on Charmouth beach. He’s a geologist so of course there was fossil chat involved. He found an ammonite, handed over a family ring, Bianca said yes, and then the skies immediately dumped on them. Engagement celebrations were a soggy sandwich in the car. Peak romance.
The Wedding Vibe
DIY from top to bottom. Wedding arch, bunting, bouquets, Bianca’s flower crown, table decor, and a glitter bar with a thrifted armchair and lampshades. Colour palette? Bright pinks, oranges, burgundies, and disco balls scattered like treasure.
The Outfits
Joe went for a jazzy suit with a custom lining in the wedding colours. The Mos Bros staff apparently gathered round like it was the grand unveiling of a national treasure.
Bianca hunted through bridal charity shops until she found the one, a dress that screamed “I am the main character” without her saying a word.
The Food & Music
Sri Lankan street food from Ceylon and Beyond Catering. All veggie. All flavour. Guests went feral for it. Roaming band The Broadsmen floated through the trees, playing ceremony bangers, reception toe-tappers, and probably a few numbers they made up just for the day.
The Fire, Glitter & Smoke
Between the glitter bar’s shimmer and the campfire’s glow, guests were either roasting marshmallows on sticks like sugared-up cavemen or walking around looking like disco royalty.
The Dick Pic – Studio Enso Style
Then came the smoke bombs. Gorgeous, colourful clouds that somehow, within seconds, turned into an unplanned display of very questionable, very phallic prop work. This is why we cannot have nice things.
The Day
Joe had one too many pre-speech pints, which made for some unpredictable mic moments. His highlight? Bianca walking down the aisle, closely followed by being gifted a personalised Bradford City shirt. Bianca’s highlight? Seeing her favourite people losing it on the dancefloor and her bridesmaids delivering speeches spicy enough to power a small city.
Sometimes it’s…. (whoops can’t think of a cheesy quote to add… soz)
Our Wedding Day
FAVOURITES
Lets Wrap It Up!
Candleston Woods
Probably the only wedding venue I’ve ever thought… I wish I could live here…
This was chaos in the best possible way, colour, music, glitter, marshmallows, smoke, and joy from start to finish.
Not a Pinterest-perfect day in sight, just pure “this is us” energy. Barefoot dancing under the trees, guests covered in glitter, smoke bombs used in ways the manufacturers never intended, the couple grinning at each other like naughty kids all day.
We left knackered, sweaty, and with memory cards stuffed full of the kind of moments you cannot fake.
The sun went down, disco balls kept spinning, and Candleston Woods stayed loud long after we packed up.
Don’t Be a Wedding Planning Douche
If you wnat your wedding to be obscene amounts of fun (and not just a stress-soaked Pinterest checklist), you need us and our guide.
My Zero-Boring-Bullshit Wedding Guide is packed with tips to dodge the drama, bin the boring, and make sure you spend more time drinking, dancing, and having a laugh than worrying about centrepieces.
Let’s Make Epic S**T!
Fancy your own Cwtchy Smoochy Session?
If you’ve booked your venue, locked in your date, and you’re now hunting for the right wedding photographer, this one’s for you.
We offer a free Cwtchy Smoochy Session to couples who are at that stage, because let’s be honest, you’ve got to vibe with your photographer. It’s the best way to see if we’re a good fit (and get some cracking photos while you’re at it).
We’ve only got three spots a month, so if you’re keen, pop your details in the form and hit that button to join the waiting list.
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